Taking responsibility, to me, means owning up to every part of life or the situation whether positive or negative.

While watching a show on the OWN Network, Oprah said something that I now truly know what it means. ” As adults you have to start taking responsibility for your own life”. For an odd reason I am now understanding what she is talking about.  I am sure because of my early twenty-age, life will give other concepts and examples of that phrase’s meaning.For now, I can only relate it to not being in graduate school; very far from being in a situation in life that I am  happy about.

Where I should be in my life and the advancement in my field is a stark contrast to where I am now. In other words, my ideal is not my reality and my reality is suffocating me. I can not blame anybody but myself. Not taking advantage of time and procrastinating is my biggest fault. It is the reason why I am scrambling to search for a graduate school and financial aid at such short notice.

I am taking full and the ultimate responsibility for it which sucks but, it is also very helpful. Its my responsibility that I am not in graduate school for neurophysiology. It is my responsibility that I am at some crappy job that I hate and also that is beneath my capabilities.

It is my responsibility that I do not feel good enough.
It is my responsibility that I am not happy.
It is my responsibility that I am not happy with my own life.
It is my responsibility that I do not have joy in my life.

I am responsible for my life!
I am responsible for my choices!
I am responsible for my happiness!
I am responsible for turning my life around!
I am responsible forgetting all that I want!

 

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